Sunday, April 12, 2009

Hannah Montana – 18, Legal and Dangerous; plot to the 2010 sequel to Hannah Montana movie

In 2010, the year the Republicans hope to regain seats in the House and Senate, followers of the evil and sinister Rush Limbaugh kidnap Sasha and Malia Obama, making it look like Somalia pirates and Afghan terrorists united to get at the U.S.

Limbaugh’s plan is to destroy the nation by recruiting every idiot throughout the country in his diabolical plot. That was most of the nation, especially those who follow American Idol and Lost on television. For some reason, the entire population of Canada and Mexico joined Limbaugh – perfect foils for Limbaugh’s minions.

Enter the hero of the nation, Oprah Winfrey. Secretly she had been training the nation’s top music talent for two years. She was inspired by the Jonas Brothers’ video, “Burnin’ Up,” which she saw on YouTube.

Secretly she had Miley Cyrus and the Jonas Brothers train first with David Carradine (who starred in the Jonas Brothers video), then CIA, FBI and Al Sharpton’s body guards. The hard part was keeping it off TMZ.

In order to draw out Limbaugh’s Idiots, Oprah arranges to have Miley’s 21st birthday party at Disney World in the summer of 2010. Oprah knew the national media was too stupid to realize Miley had only turned 17 the previous December. After all, in 2008 they bought the fact that Miley had her 16th birthday party at Disneyland four months before she actually turned 16.

There’s the usual rock movie chase scene in Disney World, similar to a Monkees TV show or KISS meets the Phantom of the Park.

California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger makes an appearance in the movie – after all, he is running for California Senator Barbara Boxer’s seat. He is the Republican front runner for it.

The movie ends with Hannah throwing one of Wonder Woman’s truth lassos when Sasha and Malia are found at a nearby wax museum and freeing the First Children. Unfortunately the family dog, Bo, loses his life in the battle. The final scene is the family getting a new canine and naming it Chuck after the recently deceased Chuck Berry. The pooch is a gift from America’s oldest teenager, Dick Clark.

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